Gift in an Apple Core
2013
Whether they come through a tightening in the chest, a flicker of unease in the stomach, or an expressive lifting of the cheeks, we’re all intimately familiar with the ways emotions move in and through our bodies.
Some pass continually through us, day after day, and we let them go easily. Mild annoyances or small pleasures often move through unimpeded and don’t make much impact.
But others, in contrast, become stuck in our bodies, stuffed down once and piled upon ever after. Though when they arise these emotions might seem connected to a unique situation in our lives, many of them are actually touching on old thoughts and ideas that lay deeply buried within us.
Because emotions often originate from a belief. Imagine, for example, that you’re at work and feeling a little hungry. You remember the apple you brought today, and start to think about it, anticipating its texture, its taste. But when you go to the kitchen and open the fridge, the spot where you’d left your apple is vacant. A peek in the garbage can reveals the remains of your apple chomped tidily down to its core.
The situation is thus: someone has eaten your apple. That’s the only factual information you have at this moment. Who has done it or what their motives are remain wholly unknown to you. Any ideas, and thus emotions, that arise right now are connected to the thoughts and beliefs that were already there when you placed the apple in the fridge this morning.
For some of us, this might elicit no real emotion at all. Someone ate your apple? Not a big deal. You can get another apple, or grab something else. Whatever annoyance or frustration comes up might move right on through without any obstruction.
But for others, what might on the surface seem like not such a big deal can trigger ideas or beliefs that are not necessarily even conscious. “No one respects me,” maybe, or “Nobody cares about me.” It could be anything, really, but whatever gets touched by this experience catalyzes an emotional response. Particularly if the response feels out of proportion to the specific event, the emotion is there as a messenger with something to share.
It may express as anger, fear, or even shame. Whatever that emotion is, the trick is to bring awareness to it. Rather than reacting immediately–fishing the core out of the garbage and dangling it accusingly in the face of the most likely suspect, for example–you could choose instead to respond to the situation within yourself.
Pause. Breathe. Notice your body. Where is there tension? When you pay attention to that sensation, what happens?
The truth is that all our emotions require of us is our presence and our awareness. They’re asking to be heard. When we honor them with our attention, they can in turn honor us with the deep and important messages they bear.
Breathe. Listen. Where’s the gift? Because there undoubtedly is one there for the taking.